A Strong Thesis Statement: Tips and Examples | Make a Stand

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A Strong Thesis Statement: Tips and Examples | Make a Stand

A thesis statement is a central element of an academic essay and an important academic writing skill. It presents the major message of the paper and a short summary of the points you make. This way, a thesis statement prepares your reader and facilitates understanding.

It is a thesis statement that adds logic and coherency to your writing.

A logical and coherent essay can be written only around a thesis statement: presented in the introduction, supported in the body paragraphs, and restated in the conclusion.

The good news is that once you have a strong thesis statement, you know what to include into each of these elements of an essay structure.

So let me show you what a strong thesis statement looks like.

Therefore, here are the best patterns to use: Argumentative thesis statement:
Shakespeare’s authorship of his plays is beyond question, given both the entirely unconvincing nature of any counter-theories and the relatively unstable conception of the playwright’s identity as it stands.
(The basic conclusion is that Shakespeare did write his plays

How to write a thesis statement (with examples)

What if I told you that one sentence in your essay or thesis could be the difference between a First and a Fail?

It may sound absurd – perhaps even unfair – but it’s true. I refer, of course, to the thesis statement. A thesis statement is your entire essay if it were condensed into a single sentence. If your essay title is a question, then your thesis statement is the one-sentence answer.

It tends to arrive near the end of the first paragraph of a thesis.

Let’s take a look at an example from a Master of Education degree thesis:

Thesis title
What constitutes ‘good writing’ for GCSE students of English?

Thesis statement
The examination rubric by which GCSE English writing performance is assessed, influenced by a long history of variable ‘tastes’, may now be said to describe ‘good writing’ as that which is grammatically accurate, sophisticated, and suited to purpose, genre and audience.

(The thesis statement would be located in paragraph 1, after a brief overview of the subject).

Why is a thesis statement important?

As I mentioned, the way your thesis statement is written can be the difference between a First and a Fail. But how?

To answer that, let’s think about what ‘thesis’ means. From the Greek thésis, meaning ‘proposition’, your thesis is your main argument.

It is the position you have to support and defend for the remainder of your essay. Without something clear to defend, the fortress you build will crumble and the army you deploy will run about like headless chickens.

In essence: without a clear thesis statement, you don’t have an essay.

“Establishing a clear thesis at the start of your essay is crucial for both you and your examiner. For your examiner, it’s evidence that you have answered the question. For you, it can function as an essay plan.”

For both of you, it’s a litmus test for the quality of the argument: if you can’t fit your essay’s arguments into a sentence, they are too diffuse

A precisely focused and well-grounded essay is more worthy of a First Class grade than one with a scattergun approach.

What should a thesis statement include?

What your thesis statement includes is determined by three things:

1. The subject and topic of the essay.
2. The purpose of the essay.
3. The length of the essay.

Let’s examine each of those in more detail to see how they can help us refine our thesis statement.

The subject and topic of the essay

Look at this real-life title from an undergraduate Sports Science essay:

What are the key differences between training recommendations for maximising muscular strength and maximising muscular hypertrophy?

The first task is, of course, to determine the subject of the essay.

In this example, that would be ‘training recommendations for maximising muscular strength and training recommendations for maximising muscular hypertrophy’.

Knowing that means that I know I will need to deploy my knowledge about those two similar but distinct areas. It also means that I should be using the specialist terminology relevant to the field, such as load, isotonic and volume.

Here it would be ‘the key differences’ between training recommendations for those two goals. That phrase ‘key differences’ is likely to be at the heart of my thesis statement, to show that I’m on track.

With that in mind, my thesis statement might look like this:

Whilst both training outcomes require resistance training centred upon isotonic contractions, it is likely that the absolute load requirements may need to be higher for strength purposes, whilst the total training volume may need to be higher for hypertrophy purposes.

It is by no means a complete essay, but it states clearly what the ‘short answer’ to the question is, whilst paving the way for the ‘long answer’ to follow.

But what if the essay isn’t just looking for the facts organised into a specific order? What if the essay is asking for analysis? Or an argument?

The purpose of the essay

Different essay purposes require different thesis statements. Fortunately, there are only three main essay purposes, and they’re pretty easy to recognise:

1. The expository essay:
This is an essay type that asks for the key facts on a subject to be laid out, with explanations. The Sports Science question above is an example of this. It asks for the WHAT and HOW of something.

2. The analytical essay:
This essay type asks you not only to lay out the facts, but also to analyse and deconstruct them to better understand them. It is typical in subjects such as English Literature and Fine Art. It asks for the WHY of something.

3. The argumentative essay:
This type of essay asks you to use the facts available, to analyse them for value, and then to provide a point of view about the subject. It moves more quickly through the WHAT, HOW and WHY of a topic through to: WHY DOES IT MATTER?

All of the above essay types need a thesis statement that includes a proposition (a statement which answers the question or addresses the title).

Beyond that, these three essay types all require different additions.

For the expository essay, you need to add an overview of the details of the conclusion. Let’s look at an example:

Expository essay title:
What are the key differences between training recommendations for maximising muscular strength and maximising muscular hypertrophy?
(BSc in Sports Science)

Expository thesis statement:
Whilst both training outcomes require resistance training centred upon isotonic contractions, it is likely that the absolute load requirements may need to be higher for strength purposes, whilst the total training volume may need to be higher for hypertrophy purposes.
(The basic conclusion is that both approaches need isotonic resistance training

For the analytical essay, you need to add an overview of the analysis performed. Here’s an example:

Analytical essay title:
Why did England and Wales vote to leave the European Union?
(BA in Politics)

Analytical thesis statement:
A close consideration of the voter demographics, the populist nature of political messages leading up to the referendum, and the history of Britain’s status in the EU, will demonstrate that Brexit was primarily motivated by the machinations of the Right.

(The basic conclusion is that Brexit was influenced by politicians

For the argumentative essay, you need to add an overview of your reasoning. Another example:

Argumentative essay title:
To what extent do you consider the authorship of Shakespeare’s plays to be in question?
(BA in English Literature)

Argumentative thesis statement:
Shakespeare’s authorship of his plays is beyond question, given both the entirely unconvincing nature of any counter-theories and the relatively unstable conception of the playwright’s identity as it stands.
(The basic conclusion is that Shakespeare did write his plays

As you can see from these examples, the purpose of the essay gives a very clear demand for something beyond a simple answer.

The length of the essay

The prescribed length of the essay also defines what you need to do with your thesis statement.

Your thesis statement is a microcosm: a miniature, compressed version of your whole essay.

So, it makes sense that the length of the actual essay is going to impact upon the content of the thesis statement.

If, for example, your essay is expected to be 800 words long and on the subject of Eve in the Bible, then it would be overly ambitious for your thesis statement to say: ‘through comprehensive study of the Bible and extant criticism’. For an 800 essay, more precision will be necessary. It would be better for your thesis statement to say: ‘with due awareness of the complexity of the issue, focusing on feminist readings of Genesis.’

“Matching the scope given in your thesis statement to the depth you provide in your essay is a very effective way to ensure precision.”

Contrastingly, if your essay is expected to be 80,000 words long (a PhD thesis, for example), on the subject of stop-motion animation, it would be rather unambitious to suggest that the essay will ‘provide a visual analysis of Wallace and Gromit: The Wrong Trousers’, only. For a PhD, we would expect more content to be covered, and multiple approaches to analysis to be considered.

Indeed, matching the scope given in your thesis statement to the depth you provide in your essay is a very effective way to ensure precision.

So, to summarise, how do I write a thesis statement?

1. Identify the question in the title (or make a question from the statement).
2. Answer that question in as few words as possible.
3. Complete the sentence by providing an overview of the foundation behind your answer.

That said, there are plenty of traps that essayists can fall into with this part of the essay. Let’s look at some of these pitfalls and how to avoid them.

Pitalls to Avoid

Pitfall #1: amateurish style

This is common throughout academic essays written by beginners. It’s not just the thesis statement that falls foul of sounding amateurish. There are plenty of ways this happens, which are beyond the scope of this argument, but the following example is a prime example:

In this essay, I will explore the various pieces of evidence before concluding.

This is amateurish for a few reasons. Firstly, it doesn’t actually say anything. You could otherwise word it, ‘I will write an essay which answers the question’ – a rather wasted sentence. The next, and more forgivable issue is the use of the first-person. We want to get a sense that an individual wrote this essay, but we never want to hear them mentioned! Make sense? No? Sorry.

This essay considers evidence from X in light of Y which ultimately reveals Z at the heart of the issue.

(It focuses on the specifics, X, Y, and Z, and is devoid of any mention of its author.)

Pitfall #2: empty phrasing

This is similar to amateurish style. However, empty phrasing is not just amateur-sounding

Using phrases such as “in order to” instead of, simply, “to” – or “due to the fact that” instead of just “as” – look like attempts to fill up the word count with waffle rather than content. The same goes for phrases that can be substituted for one word: ‘it is evident that’ can (and should) become ‘evidently’.

Watch this thesis statement from a GCSE essay on Music go from hideous to tolerable:

Beethoven was unable to hear his work, due to the fact that he was deaf, so it is evident that he musically conceptualised the notes in order to compose.
(Wordy!)

Beethoven was unable to hear his work, as he was deaf, so it is evident that he musically conceptualised the notes to compose.
(Slightly less wordy.)

Beethoven’s deafness made him unable to hear his work, so evidently he musically conceptualised the notes to compose.
(About as concise as such a complex sentence will get…)

Do not mistake wordiness for sophistication. Your ideas should be sophisticated

Pitfall #3: non-standard grammar

For an examiner, the English language is not just a vehicle for your ideas. It should be, but the academic process always involves the assessment of your expression.

So, to satisfy our examiners’ prescriptive tastes, we need to adhere to the basic tenets of Standard English.

Take a look at the following thesis statement example from an A Level Sociology essay:
Considering the status of BAME in Internet culture, the demonstrably racist treatment at the hands of the police, and the energy behind the BLM protests, concluding that there is hope for the future.

This sentence has no finite main verb, so it is technically not a sentence. To become a grammatical sentence, we would need to make ‘concluding’ finite: ‘it can be concluded’, or ‘we conclude’.

The writer got lost in this example because the sentence was so long!

Long sentences can also lead to a failure to make subject and verb agree, like in the next thesis statement example from a school Geography essay:

The most populous municipalities of Spain, Madrid, Barcelona, Valencia, Seville, and Zaragoza, does not rank in the top ten most dense populations of the country, with the exception of Barcelona.

Because the subject ‘municipalities’ is separated from the verb ‘does’ by eight words, it is easy to forget that they do not agree. It should, of course, be ‘do, not ‘does’.

Final words

The thesis statement, as I said at the start, can be the difference between a First and a Fail. So, take your time with it.

Then redraft and refine it several times, until it’s as good as you can make it.

The payoff is a slick, coherent thesis statement that paves the way to a great essay that really impresses your examiner.

Expository essay title:
What are the key differences between training recommendations for maximising muscular strength and maximising muscular hypertrophy?
(BSc in Sports Science) Writing a thesis statement for research papers is as important as the entire paper. Do you think that the readers will be interested in reading your research if they will have no clear idea about it? They will not. Before reading the paper, everyone wants to know if it is interesting and has what they are looking for.

How to Write a Research Paper Thesis?

Writing a thesis statement for research papers is as important as the entire paper. Do you think that the readers will be interested in reading your research if they will have no clear idea about it? They will not. Before reading the paper, everyone wants to know if it is interesting and has what they are looking for.

A thesis statement format is simple and subtle. With a thesis statement, you want to inform the reader about the main research question while keeping the details for the main research paper sections.

To write a strong thesis statement for a research paper, follow the below guidelines:

  • Make it brief and concise and do not try to add too much in it.
  • Keep it focused and targeted to the main idea.
  • Write it after writing the entire paper because then you will have a better idea of what you have discussed in the paper.
  • Add it after the introduction.
  • Make it informative and interesting for the reader.

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Get useful ideas on how to write a good thesis statement with these thesis statement examples for research papers. This clearly indicates what is going to be discussed in the paper and body paragraphs of the essay.

Frequently Asked Questions About a Thesis Statement

Most students find writing a great thesis statement to be a complex task, as the entire essay relies on it. In this section, we will answer and clear any ambiguities that you might have about how to make a thesis statement.

How long is a thesis statement?

The ideal length for a statement is one to two sentences long, which is about 30-40 words. However, the length of a statement depends on the type of essay you are writing. For example, if you are writing a typical 5 paragraph essay, you wouldn’t make your thesis super long.

Similarly, if you are writing a more complex and lengthy paper, such as a research paper, the thesis statement will be written accordingly.

How to start a thesis statement?

To start a thesis statement, first, come up with a question regarding the topic at hand. Think of a topic that needs to be addressed, and then answer it with your statement.

Question: “Why should kids in the 4th-grade use computers in class?”

Thesis Statement: “Having computers in class can help 4th graders develop technological skills. ”

This example of a thesis statement will help you understand the concept.

Can a thesis statement be a question?

A thesis statement cannot be a question because it defines the purpose of the essay and states your claim.

Can a thesis statement be a hook?

No. a thesis statement cannot be a hook because both of them serve different purposes. A thesis is written at the end of an introductory paragraph and makes a claim.

In contrast, a hook sentence is the opening lines of an introduction and is written to grab the reader’s attention.

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While writing a thesis statement, remember that it reflects and highlights the main purpose of your essay. This statement for research papers and high school essays should be clear and states the main argument of the paper. A thesis statement captures the main idea of a paper in one or two sentences. Your thesis statement points the reader to your interpretation of the subject under discussion and is important to the research question .

Examples

Here are some examples of thesis statements (cf. JBirdwellBranson, https://www.servicescape.com/blog/25-thesis-statement-examples-that-will-make-writing-a-breeze, Last accessed 28 th Mar 2019) to give you a better idea of how to formulate your own thesis statement.

Please note that the following sample thesis statements are intended as examples only, as they have not been fully researched. It is important that you come up with your own thesis statement based on your own research question . Only by giving your own thesis statement enough thought will you be able to argue convincingly.

TOPIC THESIS STATEMENT EXAMPLE
Vaccinations Many children are not vaccinated due to illness. We must ensure that all healthy and able children are vaccinated in order to achieve herd immunity.
Educational Resources for Low-Income Students Schools should provide educational resources for low-income students during the summers so that they do not forget what they have learned throughout the school year.
Populism The rise in populism on the political stage in 2016 was in reaction to increasing globalization, the decline of manufacturing jobs, and the Syrian refugee crisis.
Whether or Not to Attend University A degree from a university provides invaluable lessons on life and a future career, but not every high school student should be encouraged to attend a university directly after graduation. Some students may benefit from a trade school or a “gap year” where they can think more intensely about what they want to do for a living and how they can accomplish this.
Cyber Bullying With more and more teens using smartphones and social media, cyber bullying is on the rise. Cyber bullying puts a lot of stress on many teens, and can cause depression, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts. Parents should limit the usage of smartphones, monitor their childrens online activity, and report any cyber bullying to school officials in order to combat this problem.
Medical Marijuana for Veterans Studies have shown that the use of medicinal marijuana has been helpful to veterans who suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Medicinal marijuana prescriptions should be legal in all states and should be provided to these veterans. Additional medical or therapeutic services should also be researched and provided in order to help them re-integrate back into civilian life.
Work-Life Balance Corporations should provide more work from home opportunities and six-hour workdays so that office workers have a better work-life balance and are more likely to be productive when they are in the office.
Supporting More Women to Run for a Political Position In order to get more women into political positions, more women must be encouraged to run for office. There must be grassroots efforts to educate women on how to run for office and to support female candidates in getting a political career started.
Re-Imagining the Nuclear Family The nuclear family was traditionally defined as one mother, one father, and 2.5 children. This outdated depiction of family life does not quite fit with modern society. The definition of normal family life should not be limited to two-parent households.
Studying Abroad Studying abroad is one of the most culturally valuable experiences you can have in college. It is the only way to get completely immersed in another language and learn how other cultures and countries are different from your own.
Women’s Body Image Magazines have done a lot in the last five years to include a more diverse group of models, but they still need to do a lot more to promote healthy images of women’s bodies.
Veganism Although a healthy and ethical way to consume food, a vegan diet indicates a position of privilege. It also limits your experience of other cultures’ food if you travel around the world.
Cigarette Tax Heavily taxing and increasing the price of cigarettes is essentially a tax on the poorest Americans, and it does not deter them from purchasing. Instead, the state and federal governments should target those disenfranchised economically with early education about the dangers of smoking.
Women in the Workforce Sheryl Sandberg makes a lot of interesting points in her best-selling book Lean in, but she only addresses the most privileged working woman and fails to speak to those in lower-skilled, lower-wage jobs.
Assisted Suicide Assisted suicide should be legal and doctors should have the ability to make sure their patients have the end-of-life care they want to receive.
Diversity in the Workforce Having a diverse group of people in an office setting leads to richer ideas, more cooperation, and more empathy between people with different skin colors or backgrounds.

Examples of good and bad thesis statements

A good thesis statement is specific, clear, original, and includes a comment on how you are positioning yourself with respect to the issue at hand. You must consistently avoid vague wording. Moreover, you should avoid stating the obvious, like “The point I want to make in my paper…”.

The following checklist will help you meet the afore-mentioned requirements for writing a good thesis statement.

REQUIREMENT EXPLANATION EXAMPLES
Thesis statement must be specific The thesis statement should be narrow and focused instead of talking about very general and superficial things. Check your thesis statement for loose connections by coordinating conjunctions (e.g., and, but, or, for etc.) and add a subordinating conjunction if need be to show a relationship between two sentences (e.g., because, since, although etc.). Original thesis statement example (too broad):
There are serious objections to today’s horror movies.
Revised thesis statements (3 suggestions):
1) Because modern cinematic techniques have allowed filmmakers to get more graphic, horror flicks have desensitized young American viewers to violence.
2) The pornographic violence in “bloodbath” slasher movies degrades both men and women.
3) Today’s slasher movies fail to deliver the emotional catharsis that 1930s horror films did.
Thesis statement must be clear You must make sure that the reader understands what you mean. Words like interesting, negative, difficult, and exciting are too vague and should be avoided, just as abstract constructs like culture, society, and values. Make sure to define terms you use, as you cannot expect the reader to share your understanding of abstract concepts if you do not explain them. Original thesis statement example (not clear enough): Although the timber wolf is a timid and gentle animal, it is being systematically exterminated. [If it’s so timid and gentle, why is it being exterminated?]
Revised thesis statement: Although the timber wolf is actually a timid and gentle animal, it is being systematically exterminated because people wrongfully believe it to be a fierce and cold-blooded killer.
Thesis statement should include comment on your position on the issue Your personal stance on the subject must be made apparent to the reader, as well as how you are planning to evaluate and analyze the topic. Just announcing the topic is not enough. You should avoid making universal pro/con claims that are oversimplifications. Moreover, you should specify your reasoning and go beyond reporting facts (why bother if it has been proven already?). Original thesis statement example (just announcing the topic): In this paper, I will discuss the relationship between fairy tales and early childhood.
Revised thesis statement: Not just empty stories for kids, fairy tales shed light on the psychology of young children.

Original thesis statement example (too universal, oversimplified): We must save the whales.
Revised thesis statement: Because our planet’s health may depend upon biological diversity, we should save the whales.

Original thesis statement example (reasoning not justified): Socialism is the best form of government for Kenya.
Revised thesis statement: If the government takes over industry in Kenya, then industry will become more efficient.

Some more examples follow on how word choice ensures that your thesis statement is to the point and does not contain generic/formula words:
Original: “Society is. ” [Who is this “society” and what exactly is it doing?]
Revised: “Men and women will learn how to. ”, “television addicts may chip away at. ”, “American educators must decide. ”, “taxpayers and legislators alike can help fix. ”

Original: “the media”
Revised: “the new breed of television reporters”, “advertisers”, “hard-hitting print journalists”, “TV movies of the week”, “sitcoms”, “national public radio”.

Please note that the following sample thesis statements are intended as examples only, as they have not been fully researched. It is important that you come up with your own thesis statement based on your own research question . Only by giving your own thesis statement enough thought will you be able to argue convincingly.

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